is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize