two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
