Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
only if we run a train.
done.
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I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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