i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
