i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
