the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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