We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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