I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
