my mouth tastes like poor choices
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit