I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize