so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
