I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
