Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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