dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
