i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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