OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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