the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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