No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Operation Purity has been aborted
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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