SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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