i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
