i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
