That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
