taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
