but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
