is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
