Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
