I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I just googled if crying burns calories
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize