normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
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