She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize