I cockslap morals
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
