So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Randomize
