I just pynch a tree in the face
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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