I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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