Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
