i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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