i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
