I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
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