Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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