it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
