You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
