Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
