they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize