and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
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