I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
