dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize