We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
