There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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