I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
