it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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