I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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