The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
